Heeeeeeere's War!

That’s right. I quoted Oingo Boingo for the beginning of one of my State of the Dis-Union Addresses. I couldn’t decide between the chorus or the “It’s a shame that our kids are dumb, but our bombs are smart, what a lucky thing now” line. I guess we know which one won. Well, it looks like we’re going to war. I don’t like it. You don’t like it. The country doesn’t like it. Hell, the fucking WORLD doesn’t like it. But George Dumbya and Tony Blair want that fucking oil, so we’re going over to kick Saddam’s ass.

Does he deserve it? Of course he does. He’s an asshole, a vandal and a thief. Not to mention a bloody tyrant who kills his own people just to get himself a little more power and money. (Guess what, though? So is our government. They’ve killed probably at least three times as many people as Saddam has had a chance to kill, and for less reason.) But is he a threat to the rest of the world? Does he have weapons of mass destruction? Well, that’s where the debate comes in. The UN inspectors have been over there for months looking around the entire country (focusing, of course, on Baghdad and surrounding areas) and all they’ve found are a couple of empty canisters that USED to have some shit in them. And they probably had tiny stickers on the bottom of them that said “Proudly made in the U.S.A.”

And Georgie Peorgie keeps telling them, “He’s got it! Ah know it!! Just let me at ‘im and we’ll get it all back! We’ll kill ‘em all! We’ll turn ‘em inta mush! He tried ta kill ma Daddy! Oops.”

Fuck your daddy, dude. He was one of the absolute worst presidents we’ve ever had. (There’s one worse, and unfortunately we’re livin’ that one.) I, of course, wish him no physical harm because I’m a nice guy, but he was NEVER IN ANY FUCKING DANGER FROM SADDAM HUSSEIN!! The plot was stopped before it ever started. How many fucking world leaders have NOT thought of doing it and even gotten a little farther with it? I think the leaders of England MAY have not thought of it. But I think even they probably have. Why pick on this one guy? Why not go after the whole damn world?

Saddam’s insane. But the Shrub is fucking insane! He’s so intent on killing this guy that he’s lost sight of his own country and what he needs to do to protect it and make it better.

I saw a headline in USA Today, erm, today that said something along the lines of, “Pres. Bush predicts economic stability after war.” Yeah, that’s the way it used to work. Now war is more than a little obsolete and it really doesn’t help the economy at all. Remember the last war we were involved in? (Your dad started that one, Shrub.) We ended up in one of the worst recessions this country has ever seen right after it was all over. This one is going to be even bigger and it’s gonna screw us for a long, long time.

And speaking of screwed, let’s see what will happen when we DO actually get to this stupid ass war.

We go into Iraq and kick a little butt. Then, all of a sudden we’ve got the whole Arab world pissed off at us. How many terrorist cells do we have over here? Hundreds? Thousands? Suddenly a few of our cities are blown off the map by them. New York and LA are torn up by terrorists. A few small towns in between are completely decimated. My beloved Austin is a shell of its former self with about 2/3 the number of people. The entire Arab nation has come down on our armies, destroying them.

What is the rest of the world doing? Turning their backs saying, “We told you so. The world doesn’t like Little Hitlers.” And that’s what everyone’s calling Bush. “Little Hitler.” He’s taking his armies abroad and taking over smaller, weaker countries. Why? Oil. Pure and simple. That’s the only fucking thing we’re going over there for. We all know it.

And people wonder why we’re not going after North Korea. They actually have bombs that could destroy some of our cities (what Iraq MAY have could make it to Iran…maybe Israel). But they don’t have oil.

(“And I said, ‘Hey kid, you think that’s oil? Man, that ain’t oil, that’s blood.”–”Lost In The Flood” by Bruce Springsteen.)

My prediction may be a bit fatalistic, but it’s not too far from the truth. The US and England will be hit and hit hard by terrorism. We only thought that 9/11 was bad. What we’ll get the second we step foot into Iraq will make us curl up into the fetal position for months slapping away anything that comes near our faces while trying to put our own elbows into our ears. Our armies may be able to take the ones overseas, but they probably can’t protect us from what’s going to happen over here. They’ll try and I can respect that. I hope they do try their damnedest. I just think that the terrorists are pretty fucking resourceful.

Remember when I predicted that Dubya would get us into World War III? Well, I really wanted to be wrong, but it looks like I’m going to be right. And this time we may not be the good guys. Well, the American people will remain the good guys because NONE of us want to be over there at all. The American government will be the bad guys. But they’re the ones that count, I guess. They’re the ones who are going to get us all in trouble.

And there are a lot of people out there who think that I’m going to get in trouble for saying some of the things I say. Well, let me tell you something. This “With us or against us” attitude that Dubya has is complete bullshit. There’s no such thing as black and white in this world. Dissent does NOT equal disloyal. (Thank you to Women In Black for that billboard.) We are here to point out what is wrong with a country that we love. We are the people who are allowed to vote our representatives in and out of office. We are a democracy. We can say whatever the fuck we want about our government. If I want to say “Fuck the poe-lice” I can. (Although I wouldn’t because one of my best friends is a poe-liceman.) No one can stop me. That’s what makes this country great. That and the great men and women who helped to build it and keep it running. NOT, however, the ones who tried to run it into the ground.

Here’s an interesting fact for you: in the past few decades, every Republican president has run our economy into the ground and/or gotten us into a war. They really haven’t done anything great for us or the world. Someone will inevitably say, “Bush, Sr. got the Berlin Wall to come down and he and Reagan both made Communism fall!” Bullshit. Those things would have happened no matter who was in office over here. Communism was starting to fail in the late 70s and early 80s. Gorbechev tried to help things out, but that failed, too. And the Berlin Wall was on its way out by the time Bush the Elected got into office.

Our Democratic presidents, however, have enjoyed quite a bit of success in both the economic and military aspects. Yeah, Clinton had a few indiscretions that were pretty terrible (Somalia comes to mind), but we over here were perfectly happy with what was going on in our own country. We had a GREAT economy. We all had jobs. We were (mostly) at peace. The environment was starting to come back to us.

Now what’s happening? Giant corporations are tumbling. Everyone is losing their jobs. (Dell and Motorola hadn’t had but maybe two layoffs in the past 6 years or so. In the past year they’ve had about one a month. At least.) We’ve got dissent in the streets. We’re losing our environmental laws to big factories so that our president and vice president can make more money.

I saw another headline about a week ago that said that the GOP didn’t want a repeat of the first Bush’s second election day. Well, I’ll tell you what: we can’t afford to NOT repeat it. This country can’t take much more of Bush the Younger’s shit. We’re his toy and he’s fucking breaking us. Prices of everything are going up (especially gas, although there’s no reason at all for that to be happening) and yet he’s sitting pretty. I didn’t get my guaranteed raise last year because of company cut-backs. We can’ hire anyone else even though we’re suffering for people. It’s forcing people to work 35 days in a row with no time off. It’s bullshit. This administration is fucking us in the ass for a few drops of oil.

And, you know, we could do away with out need for oil tomorrow. Why don’t we? Because the fucking oil companies run the country. They’ve got Bush and Cheney in their back pockets and pull them out every time someone says, “Hey, wait a minute!”

A few weeks ago Bush made a speech about the environment. He made some noise about a way to turn hydrogen into fuel with absolutely no waste product. GREAT!! DO IT, MAN!! Get your team of monkeys on it NOW! He sounded so fucking proud of himself for finding out what environmental scientists have known for decades. Will he actually do anything about it? Nope. Never.

He’d rather go to war. He’d rather kill a bunch of our guys and make a few bucks off of it.

I’ve got two verses for you and all of your drinkin’ buddies, Shrub:

How much do I know

To talk out of turn

You might say that I’m young

You might say I’m unlearned

But there’s one thing I know

Though I’m younger than you

Even Jesus would never

Forgive what you do

Let me ask you one question

Is your money that good

Will it buy you forgiveness

Do you think that it could

I think you will find

When your death takes its toll

All the money you made

Will never buy back your soul

–”Masters Of War” by Bob Dylan

I have never felt that song more than now. It’s got to be the angriest song EVER written.

When we look at the world today we see that nothing is truly successful except for “reality television,” something that is neither reality nor television. That’s a sad state of affairs.

I heard that Charles Rangel, a Democratic Representative from New York who opposes the war, wanted to reinstate the draft as a tool to protest the war. He says that it will make the people who make the decisions look a little harder at what they’re doing and, when we do go to war, it will make the fighting forces more diversified. More rich kids will be over there than in times of no draft.

Personally, I would burn the proverbial draft card and move to Canada. A buddy of mine is in the Marine Reserves and I know he doesn’t want to go over there. He was all for it when we were actually looking for the guy who blew up our buildings. He was pretty much packed and ready to go. Now he’s against it. I want him to go somewhere they can’t find him. I sincerely hope that he finds a way out of it. Hell, I’ll break his leg to keep him here. And I think there are friends and family all over the country who feel the same way.

I’ll leave you with this thought: I do have hope. Seriously. It’s buried, though. It’s buried in our next election. But, if that one is fixed like the last one was, we’re all fucked. This is what warmonger Bush wanted all along and it looks like he’s going to get it.