Identity

Before we get to the murder and mayhem, let’s pick off some previews. PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN-Ok, I had no faith that this movie would be any good at all. It basically looked like a fucking waste of time and talent for what was going to be a no-story piece of shit.

Now the previews have come out. And it at least looks like it could be a good, fun flick. Maybe no true winner or anything, but it looks like Johnny Depp and Geoffrey Rush were having a blast making it. And it’s directed by Gore Vorbinski, director of The Ring, so it could even be a little bit scary.

And, even better, there don’t seem to be any “Bad Dog!” moments.

I’ll check it out.

THE ITALIAN JOB-Having never seen the original (but I’m working on it) I have no point of reference for the remake, but it looks pretty good. I could watch paint dry on Charlize Theron, so that’s one plus that it has (and there’s no Keanu!) and Edward Norton is always high on my list of actors to see in movies. Mark Wahlberg is another story, though. He hasn’t impressed me lately. He hasn’t made a truly good movie since Three Kings. (Perfect Storm doesn’t really count although I kinda liked it.) I know he has it in him to be a good actor, so why doesn’t he try it in some good movies? I hate that!

Along for the ride in the Mini are Seth Green, Donald Sutherland, Mos Def and Jason Statham. It’s one to make some time for.

ALEX AND EMMA-Which brings us to this one. What the hell is it? It’s a romantic comedy by Rob Reiner based on the true story of Dostoyevsky and his transcriber.

A writer (Luke Wilson-HA!) hires someone (Kate Hudson) to type out his latest novel as he dictates it. She starts to have input that he doesn’t want, but it makes it into the story anyway. They fall in love. End of story. Whatever.

Kate plays four or five different roles in the different stories that are going on in Luke’s head.

I’m not so sure about this one. Looks pretty typical. But the goofiness of Kate and Luke might work well together. I guess we’ll see. But not until video.

CHARLIE’S ANGELS-FULL THROTTLE-Despite the shitty title, I really want to see this one. I liked the first one quite a bit and this one looks like it might be even bigger and better. Plus it has Demi Moore coming out of retirement as a fallen Angel! What more could we want? How about the Creepy Thin Man back again? Well, Crispin is back, too.

I’m all over them, er, it.

Now to the ten little Indians.

What happens when you get ten flawed people together on a dark and stormy night at a creepy old motel on a deserted road that no one can get to?

People DIE!!!

That’s what happens when a limo driver with a past (John Cusack), the ex-movie star he’s driving around (Rebecca De Morney), a questionable cop (Ray Liotta) and the scary inmate he’s transporting (Jake Busey), a weak husband (John C. McGinley), a comatose wife (Leile Kenzle), their quiet son (Bret Loehr), a skittish motel manager (John Hawkes), a call girl on the run (Amanda Peet), a young, just married couple (Clea DuVall and William Lee Scott), the Professor and Mary Anne meet up here at Gilligan’s Sadistic Motel.

Sure, they’re all pretty much archetype characters, but the actors are so good in their roles that they never become caricatures. The best is, of course, Cusack as a guy who is so much more than just a limo driver. He has a dark spot on his past, but he never lets it define him.

In fact, everyone has a dark spot on their past. There are no clear consciences here. Each character has their little quirks that makes them basically not a good person. Not always bad, just not good.

Oh, and there’s a little story going along with it about a prisoner who is facing the chair tonight if Alfred Molina can’t convince the judge that he’s insane. What does that have to do with anything? Watch and find out.

This is one of the best slasher flicks I’ve seen in a long time. Certainly the smartest since the original Scream and the most serious one since the first Nightmare On Elm Street. But it’s never fully a horror movie. It’s a psychological thriller with slasher/horror aspects…kinda like Psycho. But it ain’t THAT good.

There are lots of good scares, but some of them are pretty cheap (There’s something clumping around the big dryer. I wonder what it is!) and the ending is a little too much of a “shocker” to really work. But it would have been too neat otherwise. Hopefully they don’t decide to take the movie to Sequel Land.

Check it out if you’re up for a good scare and a bit of a mind fuck.