The Haunted Vagina Carlton Mellick III

For most heterosexual men, a vagina opens up a whole new world for them. But what would you do if that phrase was taken literally? What if said vagina actually was a door to another world? Would you be freaked out and leave the girl high and dry? Or would you dive in head first and explore as much as you could?

This is the delimma faced by Steve. One night, when making love to his girlfriend, Stacy, he hears some weird noises coming from what seems like her torso. Her response to his questions is kind of strange: “Oh, that’s just my vagina. It’s haunted.”

WHOA!!!

Carlton Mellick III is one of the headliners of the new Bizarro movement in literature. A buddy of mine bought this book for me after reading The Baby Jesus Butt Plug and Fishy Fleshed. Obviously, this movement isn’t for everybody. (Among his other titles: The Menstruating Mall, Razor Wire Pubic Hair, Electric Jesus Corpse and Ocean Of Lard.) Most of the books are pretty short, but they know how to make an impact.

There was something about this strange story that made me want to keep on reading. You wouldn’t think that a story about a girl with a haunted vagina would be….ok. You WOULD think it would be pretty interesting, but you wouldn’t think that it would STAY interesting throughout the book. You would think that it would lose some steam towards the end. Not so. This keeps you up until the end. You think you know where it’s going, but trust me. You don’t.

Certainly, one of the strangest books I’ve ever read, but I want to read more. Mellick is a talent that has yet to reach his peak and I hope that more people find him. But not too many more. I want to be part of the cult.

I would put an Amazon link on here, but I think it’d be cooler if you ordered it directly from Carlton’s website. So, check that out.