SXSW2008-RSO (Registered Sex Offender)/The Night James Brown Saved Boston/Joy Division/Love Songs/Shuttle
“Why are you doing this?!”(I was asking the same thing.)
Welcome, welcome to the last night of SXSW2008. I finally got to see five films in one day! (Although, if I had been able to get my ass out of bed earlier, I could have seen six or seven.)
I SLAMMED MY DICK IN THE DRAWER (2008)
Directed by: Jeffrey Brown
Written by: Jeffrey Brown
I started my day off with a short before RSO…the only short I saw all week! Blast!
I Slammed My Dick In The Drawer is about exactly what it sounds like it’s about. A guy accidentally slams his dick in a drawer. How, you ask? I’m not exactly sure even after the rather painstaking (and painful) re-enactment.
Told like a news story it almost does everything a short should do: it told its story and got out of there quickly. At four minutes it never seemed to outstay its welcome. But I can’t say it was particularly compelling. I kind of wish that I could, but I can’t.
His fiancee was pretty funny, though. “It’s the only dick I have…for the rest of my life.”
RSO (REGISTERED SEX OFFENDER) (2008)
Directed by: Bob Byington
Written by: Bob Byington
Then came RSO. Tim (Gabriel McIver) has a secret problem. Ok, so by order of the Texas Judicial System, it’s not so secret. He is a registered sex offender.
He’s also a bit of an asshole. He jokes about everything (including his status in the government’s books) and doesn’t take his punishment seriously at all. Even in prison his anus was, as they say, distended and he just took it as a joke.
His girlfriend, Tina (Kristen Tucker), finds it funny at first. But soon enough she’s sick of it. In fact, everyone’s sick of it, including the neighbors he had to tell about his registration.
You may ask what he did to deserve this status. Even that doesn’t get a straight answer. He tells everyone a different disgusting story about little girls in bathrooms.
Featuring a cast of Austin regulars (including Kevin Corrigan, Richard Linklater, Bob Schneider and Bill Wise), Bob Byington’s film is a pretty funny mockumentary of one man using his defense mechanism so much that it nearly takes everything away from him. Maybe a tad overlong, it still keeps interest and has some really good laughs.
It also brings up a lot of good questions about the validity of the RSO program. You could have been an 18 year old guy who got caught by the parents of your 16 year old girlfriend and end up on the list for the rest of your life. Or it could have been a totally stupid mistake that really wasn’t your fault. Anyone could end up on the list. This sort of thing ruins lives.
Now, there are some real scumbags who deserve this treatment, no doubt about it. Child pornographers, molesters, etc…yes. They need to be humiliated and we should probably know where they are living so our kids stay away from them. That sort of thing doesn’t really go away. But do you want to ruin a guy’s life because when he was 18 he was attracted to a 16 year old? I’ll go ahead and answer that for you: no.
THE NIGHT JAMES BROWN SAVED BOSTON (2008)
Directed by: David Leaf
Written by: Morgan Neville
Now, from a guy who screwed up once to a guy who saved a town from being wiped off the map.
April 4, 1968 was a horrible day in America. One of the biggest leaders of the Civil Rights Movement was shot and killed in Memphis. That night, thousands of people across the nation decided to rise up in violence for retribution against the white world that they saw as the cause of Martin Luther King, Jr.’s assassination.
The next day would just get worse. Boston, however, had a secret weapon. If only the mayor had the guts to use it.
Luckily, he was talked into allowing James Brown to go ahead and perform and ended up using it as a memorial for the slain leader. What happened was proof that rock and roll can change the world, if only for a night.
David Leaf (Beautiful Dreamer, The Unknown Marx Brothers and The US Vs. John Lennon) documents the night and the events after in painstaking detail. He follows Brown in the years after the Boston Garden concert to show how political he got. He never spoke of that night again (in fact, he evaded questions about it in interviews by other people), but he became sort of a political leader after, sometimes to the detriment of his career.
An engaging musical history, The Night James Brown Saved Boston is a pretty important chapter, not only to music, but to civil rights. It’s airing on VH1 soon and Shout Factory will be releasing the DVD with the full concert near the end of the year. Look for it.
The concert, by the way, is absolutely enthralling. David and his crew just got the footage on Tuesday, so the version we saw wasn’t as cleaned up as it will be for broadcast. (James’ mic wasn’t very good because the people who were filming it had no clue how to mic a rock show. They were used to classical.) But the music is amazing and the moment people start storming the stage, James just takes command of them, knowing that if they get out of hand people at home will get out of hand. “Brothers! We’re black! Let’s work together. Let’s keep it together.” It was pretty beautiful to see. I can’t wait to see the whole thing.
Directed by: Grant Gee
Written by: Jon Savage
Moving ahead about 10 years, Joy Division was on the forefront of an entirely different kind of music. Hailing from the skeletal hulk that was Manchester at the end of the 70s, Ian Curtis, Bernard Sumner, Peter Hook and Stephen Morris would end up being one of the most influential bands of the New Wave/Punk movement. Ian, however, would not live to see their influence. After two albums and a handful of singles, Ian hanged himself in his apartment, the victim of depression brought on by anti-epilepsy drugs.
Grant Gee’s (Radiohead’s Meeting People Is Easy) documentary tells their story in their own words in a visually compelling way. Interviewing not only the band, but just about anyone who ever came in contact with the band, he puts it all together with bootleg videos of performances and other interesting videos. (Including the Sex Pistols’ show where they decided to start making music! I would LOVE to get my hands on that film.)
Gee also tells the story of Manchester in then and now pictures, which is very cool. Manchester is on its way back to being a truly modern city, but he shows us what it once was and why bands like Joy Division/New Order and The Smiths were so depressed about it.
The only thing missing is an interview with Deborah Curtis, Ian’s widow. She is quoted in some subtitles, but she is never actually interviewed. That may be because she had her say in her book, Touching From A Distance. It was turned into the excellent Control last year by photographer Anton Corbijn. Some of Corbijn’s photos are used in the doc.
This film would be a great triple feature with Control and 24 Hour Party People, Michael Winterbottom’s film about Tony Wilson, the man who basically discovered Joy Division along with just about every other “Madchester” band. I’ve always believed that Joy Division’s songs should be heard in black and white. These three movies (especially Control) prove this to be absolutely true.
Directed by: Christophe Honoré
Written by: Christophe Honoré
How ’bout a French musical?
Love Songs is the story of a manag a trois that loses a member. Ismael (Louis Garrel from The Dreamers), Julie (Ludivine Sagnier from Peter Pan and Swimming Pool) and Alice (Clotilde Hesme) have been together for about a month. Alice is the new addition to a long standing relationship and she is already putting a bit of a strain on it.
When tragedy strikes, Ismael and Alice have to pick up the pieces. They each fall into new relationships that may not be good for them, but help them get over their heartbreak and loss. Julie’s family tries their best to help Ismael by insinuating themselves into his life in ways that he sometimes doesn’t want.
The movie reminded me a bit of Moonlight Mile…but without all the messy emotion. Which is to say, I really didn’t give a damn about any of these characters.
But what of the music?
Yeah, what of it? I don’t remember any of it. It was so absolutely unmemorable that I almost didn’t realize that the actors were singing until about half-way through most of the songs. The actors obviously aren’t singers, which doesn’t usually bother me that much. But I seriously couldn’t tell when they were singing. And that kind of takes away from the enjoyment of a musical.
The moral of the film seemed to be that, “If your girlfriend dies, you will turn gay.” And, you know, whatever. That doesn’t bother me that much. But people seem to change their views on homosexuality in the middle. At first it seems like no one cares one way or another. Julie’s mother doesn’t seem to care if her daughter is gay or straight. When Ismael meets Erwaan (Gregoire Leprince-Ringuet), he never tells him that he’s not gay. It’s just never a question of taking that out of the equation. And I thought that was cool, actually.
Then suddenly everyone cares if Ismael is gay. And he’s all freaked out about it. It just seems to be at odds with itself.
The last French musical I saw was Jeanne And The Perfect Guy with Virginie Ledoyen. That one had some of the same problems, but it was so much better. I cared whether the characters lived or died at least. When Julie died I was surprised, but not shocked.
Directed by: Edward Anderson
Written by: Edward Anderson
Shuttle, on the other hand, was totally shocking.
Ok. Maybe not. Not a bit, actually.
Mel (Peyton List) and Jules (Cameron Goodman) just got back from vacation and are waiting for their bags at the airport. They meet Seth (James Snyder) and Matt (Dave Power) and are immediately wary of them. They seem to just be out to get laid…especially Seth.
Soon enough, all four of them end up on a shuttle, along with Andy (Cullen Douglas) a family man with zero balls, to their homes. But it ends up being a shuttle to Hell!
Oooooh!
The driver (Tony Curran from League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen) ends up being a psychopath who robs them and forces them to take money out of an ATM for him. But he doesn’t let them go. He seems to have more sinister plans.
There’s lots of blood and intrigue and whatever, blah, blah, blah. But that doesn’t mean that this movie is the slightest bit plausible. First off, he trusts these people far too much. He lets Mel fucking go shopping! Sure, he tells her, “If you tell anyone or make a spectacle of yourself, I’ll kill all of them.” But will that stop her from passing a note to someone? Nope. Will it stop her from hiding a weapon away? No.
And this is the bad side of town that they’re driving through…where the fuck are the cops? Cops are always crawling all over that sort of place. Not to mention the fact that the shuttle itself is a little shady. “No more than 3 stops” it says on the side. What? Isn’t this a shuttle? Aren’t there about 10 seats? And what kind of airport shuttle takes you to your house? Yeah, it’s called a taxi.
At one point, the girls are forced to take off their clothes and put on high heel shoes. Fuck. I could put an ad on Craigslist and get plenty of girls willing to do that. No need to get a fucking bus to pick them up in.
There’s an explanation for (almost) everything, but it’s kind of a lame explanation. I like my horror movies without morals, thank you very much.
Hopefully writer/director Edward Anderson did better with the other movie at the Festival that he wrote, Flawless. I don’t know that Michael Caine and Demi Moore would have put up with this.
Oh, who am I kidding? Were they paid? Then they would have put up with it.
At the end of the movie, I said to my viewing partner, “The preceding four hours have been brought to you by some sicko’s fantasy.”
Blech.
So, that was my SXSW this year. I learned a bit. First off, Ryan Philippe and Justin Timberlake are the same person. (One just has a lower voice, but it sounds faked.) I will continue to believe this until I see them together with my own eyes. Second, no matter how hot a girl is, she’s ugly when she’s drunk off her ass. Being drunk doesn’t always excuse you from being stupid. And having someone rub your velvet jacket saying, “I’m just going to keep doing this and pretend it’s your penis” is NOT always a good thing.
Good night, everybody.
